Friends, tonight this momma needs you. She is a friend of mine and her name is Starr. She is adopting precious Nani whom she will name Daisy. ❤ Daisy has Down syndrome. Her post below breaks my heart because I was this very same momma. The momma who cried in the shower because I didn’t know how we were going to pay the next adoption fee….the momma who wanted so much to have faith instead of hope….the momma, who many times, just could NOT see how God was going to make a way.
But now I’m the momma that saw it happen. I’m the momma who knows that we started with NOTHING and God provided every single dime. It is still hard to believe. John Preston is home because of the prayers of many and because of a faithful God. He has hope and a future. He is not destined to live out his life in an orphanage. He has the opportunity here to know Jesus. There is no price too high for that.
Would you read Starr’s story below? Would you consider a donation to their Reece’s Rainbow account? Every donation makes a difference. Every single dollar.
“I don’t have a PLAN B”
When I first ‘knew’ last August that Daisy (Nani) was my child it was quite overwhelming. Not the fact that I would welcome a new daughter into my heart and home. That was entirely too easy to embrace, but the cost that was involved in bringing her home. I knew that God had sent her and I knew I had to have Faith that somehow he would also send the money. After many conversations with him I knew I had to learn to give up control…sadly something I love, and have the kind of Faith that it takes to do this seemingly crazy thing called adopting with absolutely zero money saved up and having just completed a special needs adoption only 3 months prior.
In a strange way it was exciting not knowing how this could all come to fruition. I joined a Group full of Angels called Reece’s Rainbow and couldn’t keep my nose out of the many beautiful blog posts, testaments that God will indeed move mountains, especially if it was him that called you. Families starting at zero and becoming fully funded before they even had travel approval. Others being short 10,000 dollars or more with travel dates already set…then raising the entire amount they needed in less than a day. This has been my greatest source of support and encouragement.
I started to believe that this could be me as well. That was such a great feeling. But it was a feeling I have quite frequently begged God to give me back because it disappears every other day especially now as I get closer to travel and am still so far away from being fully funded. So I cry in the shower. I cry and cry and release the stress I feel constantly now just below the surface. I try to stay present and more than anything I try so hard to have Faith instead of Hope.
I wonder what happens when it is time to get airline tickets and I don’t have the money to buy them. Will I have to wait? To postpone going? I don’t have a Plan B. I have heard of some people traveling without being fully funded but I imagine they must have some savings or someone who can help them out ‘just in case’. I don’t have that. It’s just me. I don’t even have family that can help as most of mine live in the Czech Republic. Mine was the only family that escaped in 1969 and my dad died 16 years ago. I am new to this area spending the last 30 years in San Diego and I know only a couple of people here. I work at home so we don’t get out much. Normally I can save a little every month but since I have started this adoption all the things that can happen to suck up that extra money have, including needing to purchase a new (to me) car. I hear this is actually the norm for many.
What if I go to China without all the money I need and I am there with 3 children and no money for all the fees, mandatory donations, hotels, food and travel? Will I have to stay there until I raise it?
It’s terrifying to think.
I have paid 11,000 of my fees on my own and depleted my credit cards and all the money I was able to save the first few months of the process. I have had beautiful, generous people launch fundraisers for me one after another and so many people, many of whom I don’t know have seen fit to Donate to help me bring my Daisy home. My family has given all they can. I have donated to others in the process because I know that “when you need, you give.” I have applied for every Grant available to single moms and as of yet I have heard nothing back. This is not unusual as Grant Organizations like to wait until right before you travel to let you know if you received a grant but for me that is pure torture. I always remind myself that nothing is as bad a living alone in an orphanage without love of a Family so I always manage to pull through these times of paralyzing fear.
Today is one of those days that are hard. A day I have to find the ultimate Faith that God wants me to learn. I AM trying so hard, even though I crumple often.
I hope this post doesn’t make anyone think I am not eternally GRATEFUL for all the help with Fundraising and also all the Donations I have already received. In fact I have noticed today that my FSP and Blog have more money in them than last week. I cannot ever express how GRATEFUL I am!!! My Blog does not reflect all that I need to raise though. It is the money I need while in China but not what it will cost to get us there and back.
I just had to let this out. Please understand and thank you so much for reading. PLEASE Pray for my sanity and that I will not lose my Faith!!
I love you ALL!!!
Friends, thank you for reading. Pray for this sweet momma and her little one who is waiting in China. She’s one month younger than my Neely…..can you imagine Neely having gone this long without the love of a family? Breaks my heart. Please consider donating at the link below. Let’s get this baby HOME. -Jenifer